Category: Thoughts

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India and its Women

The amount of dignity that the Indian women were expressing when I saw them in India was both inspiring, impressive and touching. No matter how dirty and dusty the surroundings would be, they always managed to keep their faces and colourful clothes impeccably clean. No matter how much misery there would be around, they would always express calmness. Carrying their children on their backs while working as hard as the men, marked by tattoos, jewellery and colours binding them to their husbands, villages and status.

For me, being a foreigner invading their natural setting, I was thrilled by how these shy and quiet women wouldn’t treat me as an intruder and close me out with common prejudice. On the contrary, when approached with a smile, their eyes sparkled of curiosity and kindness and their willingness to communicate and exchange experiences with a woman from another world was touching. I sat down on the ground with women in many different cities, talking about their daily life and their dreams, sharing laughs and random memories. The importance of them giving their time to me and the gratefulness for having access to their worlds was immense. My male travel friends looked at me with envy as they were completely closed out from the colourful and giggly reality of Indian women. For me it was a lot easier – I was granted access just by being a woman and giving them a sincere smile.

Caroline Bach1 Comment

Black Tears and Obsession

There are people that you need to meet just a few times to realise that there is something about their ways that intrigue you. The beauty of those encounters is not to be denied, on the contrary, I believe they are to be enjoyed and explored as interesting people is a very scarce resource these days. But as reality at times can be a bit cruel, the intentions and interests of two people starting to interact often differ and your own interest might grow beyond that of friendship while the other person does not seek that kind of attention from you. Reality can decide that your possibilities for getting to know somebody better are limited by a somehow tangible reason such as distance – or the direct slap in the face such as the other person simply not gaining the same amount of stimulation from interacting with you.

Curiosity is a vicious little feeling when it gets abruptly interrupted. If somebody got your attention and you never got to further explore this person it can be very difficult to let go. Instead, you give your object of interest its own little room in your head and let it sit there and grow on you.

What often happens in that room is a process of glorification, you focus on the details that caught your interest in the first place while wondering about the rest. Curiosity tries to force you to fill in the blanks, and when you get blocked by reality, you panic and act irrational. You persuade yourself that this one is somebody you must fight for and that you just have to know what might have been.

It’s easy to forget the two most important details in this very classic situation – you don’t even actually know this person, and we are all people with our own preferences, thoughts and an ability to act, so if your object of obsession doesn’t respond to your attempts, you might just need to respect that.

Bebo y Cigala – Lágrimas Negras
Lágrimas Negras (2003)

“Aunque tú me has echado en el abandono
aunque tú has matado mis ilusiones,
en vez de maldecirte con justo encono
en mis sueños te colmo de bendiciones.

Sufro la inmensa pena de tu extravío
siento el dolor profundo de tu partida
y lloro sin que tú sepas que el llanto mío
tiene lágrimas negras como mi vida.”

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Gibran ft. McCrae

“Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children.”

“Love one another, but make not a bond of love. Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
And stand together but not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.”

Khalil Gibran

I’ve had a very nice day with friends, good food, wine and Gibran. Thus, today’s treat from me to you is an oldie by Gwen McCrae and these two masterpieces by the brilliant Lebanese poet. Khalil Gibran – The Madman (1918) + Khalil Gibran – The Prophet (1923)


Gwen McCrae – 90% of me is you
Gwen McCrae (1974)

Caroline Bach1 Comment

My extremes

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In between the extremes is the reality where most of us are, where we feel safe and where life flows comfortably without drastic changes, where you just live – and let yourself be led by your strivings to reach what your surroundings already have accomplished.

I don’t want predictability, I want the extreme points of reality, the whole spectrum. The harshest contrasts with all of their details. I want to understand both “Bottom up” & “Top down” and talk to the lonely streetkid and to the man in the shiny suit. That’s where I feel that I learn, where I can be surprised and stimulated by something new. Where I can grow and get enough experience to actually do something, to be aware of the differences.

I need the world to surprise me, to not let me conform in “in between”, to give me reasons to move beyond myself. Cheesy enough it’s why I studied both Psychology and International Relations – because that’s where I want to be, understand all the realities of other people and myself, find myself in my own extremes.

Both of the pictures above were taken in 2010. The first one is in the Streetchild rescue center in Assagao, India. The second one is with Martin Luther King Jr. III on a Peace Conference in Jaffa, Israel. Both events taught me more than a year of master studies in Sweden ever could.

At the moment I am striving for two new extremes – one in Sub-Saharan Africa and the other one in shiny places where big decisions are made. I don’t know what will happen or where I will end up, but until then I have my beloved Barcelona which gives me a lot of stimulation at the moment and which seems to be the right place to maybe one day create a home base. We’ll see. I’m looking forward to whatever the future brings.

Caroline Bach1 Comment

a Tope

Today made me feel as if I could move mountains. Singing, ice cream, live music and a walk in the sun with my lovely friend Den was the perfect ending to the amazing days we have spent together while she’s been visiting. Ending the day with a very inspirational lecture held by the incredibly charismatic Manuela Carmena Castrillo, former Chair of the UN Working Group on Arbitrary Detention made me feel on top of my world, with hundreds of new ideas and thoughts to follow up on.

The walk back home, the warm breeze announcing spring, my iPod playing deeper waters and that feeling of being right where I’m supposed to be. I was smiling to myself, embracing the flow and dancing my way forward. Balance and freedom from all unnecessary worries, looking forward to the future – being a tope.

Recloose ft. Joe Dukie – Deeper Waters
Perfect Timing (2008)

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My triangle.

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Sharing apartment with a psychologist is golden for me and my feelings and Daneff has been having a lot of fun with my overanalytical brain.

Today I managed to visualize and define the patterns, elements and complexity of my life and relations to other people with her patient guidance. Defining my current position, timing and feelings brought me the peace that I was looking for these days. Being leveled out is my strongest trait, feeling safe and comfortable internally whilst enjoying the chaos on the outside at its fullest when hopping from extreme to extreme is what I do.

Barcelona might be the place for me, my middle point, the top of my triangle. It might be where I find enough complexity and stimulation to stay and enjoy. Right now it doesn’t matter actually – I’m happy, I’m flowing, the world is huge and I’m having fun. :)

Goodnight!

Caroline BachLeave a comment

Friendships

I was just in one of the nice little bars around the corner, and with a new friend in front of me and a glass of wine in my hand the clock passed midnight. I’m good, it wasn’t that bad this time. I even got a very thoughtful present – you really do listen to the things I tell you! Thank you so much for keeping me company, I had a lot of fun and it means a lot. New friendships are a beautiful thing. So are the long and lasting ones, thank you for your calls darlings, I love you.

Caroline BachLeave a comment

La Metamorfosis

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I found Kafka (The Metamorphosis, 1915) in Spanish in the bookshelf of my new apartment and I decided to give it a try. So far it has been quite confusing but also amusing and I’m still hanging in there.

I love big bookshelves filled with books left behind by random people and I always look for them all over when travelling. Now, the fact of actually having one, filled with gems I always wanted to read – in the language I want to practice, in my own livingroom is really just another reason for not wanting to leave this magical city.

I love the fact that the choices I need to make now all are realities I really look forward to engage in. Now it’s just about deciding what alternatives I actually have and choosing the most exciting and fruitful one and see to which other places and alternatives it takes me.

I don’t agree when people tell me that I’m lucky to be encountering new opportunities all the time. I am thankful and happy about having the possibility to travel and move and search, but there are always alternatives, possibilities and choices. And with the risk of sounding pretentious, I do want to state that it is a fact that is general for most people, and that you just need to choose to look for them and dare to jump on that moving train when it passes by instead of letting life get in your way. If you enjoy change, that is. Change and development and new experiences.